WRONGED.

this quiet night, thoughts ran through my mind.
some things happened and i feel so much like i am in a confusion city, so contradicting, hesitating and scary.. (and the list goes on, negatively). people are all afraid to get hurt, so they always take a step back but never did realise they end up hurting themselves more.


i feel human.
we are very scary beings.


it's a sad thing that one regrets after a break up.
the feeling of 'learning-to-treasure-after-losing-it' is terrible, i know.
because months ago, i've been through it and i told myself never to repeat the mistake ever again (if i had a choice).


it's always like this, you are in a relationship (long term - as in years), then you get sick of the routine and felt like the commitment was getting deeper, you need to relieve. so you find yourself without freedom and giving loads of excuses to break up.

after breaking up, you had your fun and totally forgot about the 'partner' whom you hurt. then, in months, you start to get sick of your so-called 'freedom' and thinks about your 'partner whom-you-hurt' at times. then you start to reminisce the memories and you find yourself still loving the other.


suddenly, you heard a news.
you learnt that he got a new girlfriend.
you are upset, miserable, and felt like there's no tomorrow without him.
you want him back. you insist, you persist, but you failed.


you hate the girl, you call her a slut.
you wish you could give her a slap on her face.
(you might did it, but never will you realise she might you back double.)
you still feel she's the one who intrude in. you still couldn't face the reality and recall back..
who ditched whoever first?


this is human.
never ever contented.





p.s/ the above is not pinpointing at anyone, just a random topic of my humble thoughts.
p.s.s/ don't worry! it's not me either (: