SICK

gosh, i am feeling so sick now.




there's no way i can finish my assignment by tonight, i don't know if i am plain dumb or lazy. i still remember months ago when i was so motivated to study. lazing around was so bored and i decided to study, told mum and dad that i really wanted to go back to school. was very upset when singapore institute of management actually rejected me and i had to go to mdis.




well, then i got into mdis and i chosed marketing.
why the hell i choose marketing? wtffff.
the only thing that is nice is that i have lovely classmates -.-
bullshit.




(it's not about the school, it's about you, cindynah)






nahs,
i am really disappointed with myself.
i really don't know where my motivation went to.
i thought i am clever, i thought. i thought i could do well, i thought.
but i just realised that i am so stupid, i am always stucked when there's is assignment and always turn to my friends and boyfriend for help. guess, without them i'll definitely perish.





):
why am i so stupid?
(just say that you are dumb, and lazy)






am i getting crazy?
it seemed like i am talking to myself?
is anyone even listening/reading my thoughts now?







am i ke lian or do i deserve it?




i help you answer:
(people who dislike me)= you definitely deserve it you bitch!


(people who encourages me)=you can do it, just that you should work hard and don't be lazy, you are not stupid, jia you!






but why am i still not moving on when there's people encouraging me?









i hate myself for what i've become.
really.